Happy Valentine’s Day to My True Love

Filed under in case you never saw it, I thought today was a good day to republish this piece I wrote that originally published in Jackson Hole Golfer Magazine: “An Open Love Letter to Golf.”

My dearest Golf,

These last four years we have spent together have been amazing. I know we’ve had our ups and downs, but even when we struggle, I remain confident that we’re made for each other. I know you have had people leave you, but no matter how you frustrate me, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to walk away. I watch as your other lovers come and go (and return again) and I want you to know that I fully support and even encourage you to flirt with, seduce, and stimulate as many people as possible. It’s only right that I share what you have to offer with the world, so I will now express the reasons I endeavor to be with you as much as possible

Things I love about you

I love our open relationship. When I’m feeling intimate, I can have you all to myself. I can bring along a trio of friends and you’re always willing. You even introduce me to new and passionate partners I wouldn’t have otherwise met.

I love how you keep challenging me. Every time I’m with you, I learn something new about you. You’re always making me try out new positions and putting me in situations that make me use my equipment in interesting ways. From sandy lies to punch shots to controlled strokes or a full swing, you keep my interest fresh and keen from the first hole to the last every time.

I love the places we go. You have taken me all across the country and beyond, showing me gorgeous locations along the way. I have savored serene landscapes and seascapes I would never have known but for you. Along with our numerous public exhibitions, we have shared moments in romantic settings and private getaways from the mountains to the beaches and everywhere in between. The familiarity and comfort of home will always be there but I know as long as I live you will never run out of new destinations for us to share.

I love the way you keep me coming back for more. With you, I know things will never get stale. We never play a round quite the same way twice. When I have an off day or I’m feeling down about my performance, you always find just the right way to encourage me, from your bad boy act of kicking me while I’m down and making me want to prove something to reminding me just how great a pure shot feels. Each time we’re together, there’s always the opportunity to score better than the last, or even reach a new personal best. No matter how long we’re together or how good I get, that will always be the case. You also know just how to tease me. You penalize me for going out of bounds but I know you secretly enjoy it. The way you taunt me with possibilities is an exhilarating turn-on. After 15 holes of bliss and I feel I’m on the brink of something extraordinary, you throw me off course and make me endure a few extra strokes before I finish, knowing I’ll try that much harder next time. You even indulged my fantasy of holing out with a single stroke. I remember it well. Back when I’d only known you for 6 months, you gave me that thrill not once, but twice in the same week. Some people spend their whole relationship with you without ever having that pleasure. How do you choose who to favor with that luck, you devilish lothario? I feel special to be in such an elite group and no matter what happens we’ll always have that between us.

Dear Golf, thank you for understanding and even promoting obsession rather than seeking a restraining order. You have many more qualities that fuel my passion, but I’ll just leave you with one final thought: I’ve never met anyone who doesn’t love your gear.

Forever yours,

Kristen

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