The Golfchick

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Another attack with a golf club

What is it with people using golf clubs as weapons?

This week, there is another story about a kid attacking someone with a golf club. The story says some other kids helped lure the victim to a secluded area where the teen carried out the assault.

I know they have the word club right in the name and I’m sure they make great weapons (especially irons) but golf clubs are actually tools to be used to move a golf ball from one position to another. I point this out because it seems evident that these criminals are not golfers and probably qualify as bona fide morons.

Last time, the moron used a driver. This time, it wasn’t reported which club was chosen (at such close range I would think a wedge or putter was in order) but after the attack he threw the club in a river. I don’t think golfers would treat their clubs with such disrespect but if they did, they’d know which club to use. And throwing it in a river? Splashes like that should be reserved for severely misbehaving golf clubs and the pesky ponds or lakes that always seem to get the better of you.

I bet that kid’s mom (or dad) is going to be as pissed about the missing golf club as she is disappointed and saddened by the idiot she raised.

Next post.

1 Comment

  1. As long as we’re this deep into the toungue in cheek analysis – and I can’t believe you left this one out – it’s pretty obvious why the attacker threw the club into the river…he had a nasty slice !

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